scarred up again among other things

I was quite excited about getting scarred up,it was not half as painful as I last remember it, this one is for my youngest son Iseyah Taal, it is a tree which for me is a symbol of life, peace and strength. I hope these things can also be harbored in me, something of the gentle revolution.

I have a feeling tonight, that I struggled to put words to. Leunig slapped me in the face with an oversimplified vague prayer "I hope everything will be okay." Not that these vague words do justice to the knot in my stomach, but they just seemed right, to fit in an awkward kind of way. I need to just leave them there.

I'm not sure what the 'everything' is and I'm not sure what I expect 'okay' to look like, but the vagueness of it feels warm, I feel happy to sit with the vague tonight, to sit with a hope that the Great Spirit, knows exactly what the 'everything' and 'okay' is.

Leunig finished with this,
"True hope does not come in the form of some new invention to solve our problems, it's an antibody which emerges in us when we are infected with a a despair born of threat. Like resistance, hope chooses it's moment to appear, and when it emerges within us we see life afresh - and from a humbler place. Then we understand what matters and then we know what we must do."

God I put my hope in you, and I trust you even though I can't measure or order, or place a formula on life or you, teach me to embrace vagueness,suffering, joy and hope where ever they may be. And to be able to just be still in it.
Amen

This dam Pulpmill!!!!!!

I received this email today, it makes me so angry that the messages that are been delivered to us can be this conveluded. please follow the links and have your say.

It's crunch time for the Gunns pulp mill, desperate to find investors. In no small part due to your efforts, Gunns have to go to great lengths to secure finance. That's why they've enlisted some high-level help to spread their misinformation:
"Construction of the mill and flow-on investment would create some 8,000 direct and indirect jobs spread across the trades and other areas. Another 1,500 jobs would be created during operation." - Ministerial Statement by The Hon Tony Burke MP, 20091
"Construction of the Pulp Mill and flow-on investment will create some 8000 direct and indirect jobs spread across the trades and other areas. A further 1500 to 1600 additional direct and indirect jobs will be created during the Pulp Mill’s operation." - Gunns statement, 20082
It's strange enough for a publicly-elected official to do PR on behalf of a private company, but it's plain inappropriate to lift it word-for-word from company propaganda - especially when the claims themselves are bogus.

The Minister's statement was intended to be heard by potential investors around the world as a sign of government support for the environmentally and economically damaging project, at a time when that support is hugely influential for investors making a decision.

Can you tell Tony Burke to make a statement on our behalf, not Gunns'? Click here to ask him to set the record straight:

www.getup.org.au/campaign/SetTheRecordStraight

Tony Burke's not just the Forestry Minister, he's also the Minister for Agriculture and Fisheries - industries where the pulp mill is predicted to cause over 1200 job losses. The source he quotes of 8000 jobs is five years old, and has since been massively discredited. Gunns themselves are now only claiming 292 direct jobs will be created.

His other claims also don't hold up to scrutiny. That's why it's so important he sends the right signal, right now, to potential investors overseas.

Together we've campaigned to ensure the vast majority of firms in Australia and overseas won't go anywhere near Gunns' pulp mill project. With only a small number of potential investors left, we need to ensure Gunns are not able to use Tony Burke's statement as a source of security for their investment.

Ask Tony Burke to set the record straight, before potential financiers make their final decision:

www.getup.org.au/campaign/SetTheRecordStraight

We can't fall at the last hurdle - we need to let the government know the pulp mill, and it's propaganda, is unacceptable.

That's why the most important thing we can do right now is make the government speak on our behalf not Gunns', and set the record straight on the pulp mill.

Thanks for being a part of the solution,
The GetUp team

PS - Gunns are desperate to convince the few remaining potential investors their unviable pulp mill project will go ahead - just this week they've announced land-clearing work will soon begin on a pipeline to feed the mill, in an attempt to shore up finance. We need the Government to distance themselves from this project now, as investors look for clues as to what level of support the pulp mill can expect in Australia.


Other statements lifted from Gunns propaganda:

"The mill will add an estimated $6.7 billion to Tasmania’s economy." - The Hon Tony Burke MP
"The project will add around $6.7 billion, or 2.5 per cent to the Tasmanian economy." - Gunns
(The National Institute of Economic and Industry Research actually found the most likely impact on the Tasmanian economy over 20 years would be negative $0.3 billion)

"At up to $2 billion in capital expenditure, the mill would be the largest ever private sector investment in Tasmania, and the largest ever by Australia’s forest industry." - The Hon Tony Burke MP
"At around $1.5 billion in capital expenditure, the proposed mill will be the largest ever investment by the private sector in Tasmania, and the largest ever by the forestry sector in Australia." - Gunns

Sources:
1 The Hon Tony Burke, MP “Ministerial Statement by the Minister for Agriculture, Fisheries and Forestry: Preparing our forest industries for the future”, 24 June 2009
http://www.maff.gov.au/transcripts/transcripts/2009/june/preparing_our_forest_industries_for_the_future
2 Gunns Ltd. “Bell Bay Pulp MIll: Environmental, Economic and Social update” September 2008
http://www.gunnspulpmill.com.au/factsheets/Facts_Update_Sep.pdf

The kids are watching...

Reflections of my day.

Innocence is born, not acquired.
It can't be bought with dollars.
There is no refund policy.
It never defaults back to what it should be.

Our words, our violence, our sexuality are the weather that corrode it.
Let them hold it, at least for a little.

Interesting periods of time....

This is me kicking off blogging again.

Our journey here in our little community has been really interesting. I'll speak for myself at least. I feel that I spent the first year of the last three really re-drawing the lines for me, cutting ties and setting the ship to sail on new uncharted waters. Then came year two, an equally challenging year, with plenty of forming and re-shaping, but with a lot more thinking that if things are to change than it is to be from me, or that I'm going to have to have my fingers in the pie, to initiate anything. Then comes now, and I feel that I'm standing on the brink of things that I can't touch or see, with my chest full of nervous knots, my mind and heart broken from love, my spirit alive and vibrant; holding in my hand something fragile and mystical, feeling altogether ship wrecked, yet semi-pieced together, and altogether sure of the perfectness of the road ahead.
I give thanks to the Great Spirit who has placed us on this journey with each other, not just the the 14 or so of us, but all of the people that have caused me to break again and again, from the grandmothers who want to see their children thrive, the silly young parents misguiding their children like puppets for kicks, to the kids who are trying to make sense of everything in and beyond their world. As if they are holding out candles in the dark, hoping for someone to hold and guide them. These are the people that have taught me love,grace and peace. The ones who have helped me see Gods heart and face, every time I open the door, I can't help but see something Godly. When Melody sends me to the door to say not now we need a break, I always come in with someone.
I have been pursued for a time now by the notion that God heals the sick... interesting topic, but not for now. I have also been re-awakened to the fact that to every action their is a re-action, and thus to all that has happened within our neighborhood, we are experiencing a lot of flack. I recently been seeing many spirits who have bought with them nothing but harm. I feel like I have had to re-step into old shoes to walk new roads, but this time the shoes seem to hold a bit more meaning, they make a little more sense, they fit more as they should. I am appreciative that He leaves things in our closet for later times, when they will all make sense.
I am so ever thankful for this journey. I am humbled by the opposition to it, I pray that we will never lose it, this way at least I will know that we are probably moving towards God.

Fat Preddy's Drop sum it up.

Learning to breathe again
for the first time
In so long now

Learning to see again
through my pride

Learning to speak again
from my heart

Learning to be a friend
for the first time
for the first time
in so long

Chaplaincy...

So my fairly recent role as a Chaplain has been an interesting turn of events. Hearing (from kids) fairly general parental opinions and thoughts around the chaplain and the role have been a great insight into some perceptions of the church and Christians.
Figuring out my role on the other hand has been somewhat difficult but it has changed the way I view our somewhat insignificant lives in Rocherlea. One of the school social workers described herself as someone living in the ambiguous grey world between structures/organisations and people. For the children at the school she lives between the school structures and their parents, and for the parents she lives between the school structures and Child and Family Services.
Now as a Chaplain I feel something of the same. I feel that I sit somewhere in the ambiguous grey between people and the Church and the Church and God. I probably don’t have all the answers or a lot of my ideologies right but I would like to think that as someone living quite happily in the grey, maybe I can be of some help to those who fall into the ambiguous with me, and I can help them find their way.

If this is all I learn from Chaplaincy, that’s ok. I have enjoyed being someone associated with the in-betweens, maybe it’s not always healthy to live here, but for now I’ll embrace the ambiguous greyness of here.

Re-capping

Thought I’d pull this from the deep. A good friend left a beautiful comment ages ago. We had been discussing the Kingdom of God and where it is, how we interact with it and what it looks like. It makes me think ask the question again. It is probably a very helpful question to be constantly asking. For me Josh nailed it in so many ways, and I wish I was this in tune!

“I thought I’d reply to your question regarding the kingdom. We spoke about it some time ago and I wanted to reply.

What is the kingdom, I arsked myself…

Already mentioned, I feel that kingdom is a journey of continual discovery … that the kingdom, or the feeling of it, has always been there, but it is only on your life journey that you discover things, experiences both large and small, that bring you closer to recognising it.

So what is kingdom? Sharing, family, friendship, love, faith, togetherness, unity. Working together to achieve a common goal. Community. Where does Mr. Allmighty fit into the picture? Accepting us and loving us unconditionally, regardless of creed, colour, gender or speech impediments, encouraging us through love to be able to love and accept ourselves and each other, no matter what.

After a recent death in my family, I felt that I needed to rethink the concept of the Kingdom. For me, what helped me and kept me strong through this journey was the support Mr. Allmighty and the incredible love of my family. Family is number one.

In sum, Kingdom:

Looks like… Flowers in full bloom in City Park.

Feels like… A group hug with the people most important to you.

Tastes like…A barbecue in Summer, just before the sun is going down.

Sounds like... ‘Daystar’, by former Tea Party front man Jeff Martin:

I am surrounded by a light that shines
In your eyes, I see my soul’s reprise
There’s so many things I need to tell you
There’s so many things I need to show you
That could take a while

I’ve seen daylight rising like a dove
The edges of twilight in the skies above
But nothing compares with what you gave me
I didn’t know that you could save me now
You knew all along

Smells like…Roses in spring.


Cheers,

Josh M”

Thanks Joshy whereever you are!

things change before your eyes.

Well practically a year has passed, it seems like I’ve been standing still, yet it seems like the ground has moved under my feet (thanks Carol King :) you never know when the 80's will come in handy!)

I've been thinking a lot about faith lately and trying to make sense of my own. I recently had a conversation which sparked a train of thought. Religions are thing that are built of rituals and symbols; all too often (well for myself) the symbols and rituals overtake my faith, I wonder; if I were to choose symbols and rituals for myself, would they make a difference to my faith.

I wondered for a long time if that would be wrong.(to pick and choose and build something that suits me...)However I feel that I am not choosing parts of different faiths instead I'm simply choosing practices, I guess it's finding a way to touch God.

Now here is my drama. That is a fairly linear process (for lack of a better word)but the world in which we live isn't, and when a choice has been made to live alongside others and have a similar orientation does that 'orientation' include symbols and rituals?

It’s my birthday. (Thanks Rory he is 10)